This morning while receiving
my ashes, I was reminded of the story of the woman caught in adultery. We
recall in John 8 how the woman is brought before Jesus to be stoned on account
of her sins. Jesus, after writing in the sand, says to the scribes and
Pharisees, “Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.” But no stone is
cast—the scribes and Pharisees go away “one by one.” St. Augustine most
beautifully writes, “There are left only two: miseria et misericordia.”
Miseria et misericordia—misery
and mercy. These are all that remain. There is nothing in between—no pride, no
adornments—simply grace. How often, I thought this morning, do I approach Lent
with a “works righteousness” mentality: I need to do this and give up that and
sacrifice this. Now, giving things up and fasting and doing works of charity
are good and essential during the whole liturgical year, and especially during
Lent. I mean to take nothing away from them. Instead, it is the mentality which is the focus of my
concern. How often I look back at Lents of the past and say, “I gave up such
and such, but I failed,” or “that was a bad Lent”—as if the priest collects a scorecard
on Easter Sunday. In fact, looking back, I do not think I have ever actually
succeeded in Lent—never made it flawlessly to the end.
Thus every year, in the days leading
up to Ash Wednesday, I seek ways of remedying last year’s Lenten failures—give
up more, give up less, give up something different, do something positive, etc.
Yet this year during my pre-Lent reflection, I received inspiration from two
unlikely yet undoubtedly kindred souls: Martin Luther and St. Therese.
Anyone who knows the legacy of
these two souls would likely never mention them in the same breath: the one a
sixteenth century reformer who ended up on the wrong end of a bull of
excommunication, and the other a Carmelite doctor of the Church who never left
the cloister. Yet scratching the surface of their lives a bit more, we may discover
some interesting similarities: desires for sanctity, struggles with scrupulosity,
and a beautiful theology of grace. Both Luther and Therese wrestled with their
imperfections, with merit, and with mercy. And thus they concluded:
Luther:
“I have held many things in my hands, and I have
lost them all; but whatever I have placed in God's hands, that I still
possess.”
Therese: “In the evening of this life, I shall appear before you
with empty hands, for I do not ask you, Lord, to count my works. All our
justice is blemished in your eyes. I wish, then, to be clothed in your own
justice and to receive from your love the eternal possession of yourself.”
Theologian
Mickey Mattox, who first connected these two great people for me in his book Changing Churches, writes, “One can only
regret that this wonderful saint (Therese) was not around to meet with Martin
Luther as the controversy over the Ninety-Five Theses unfolded… Each of them
expected to appear before God with empty hands, and hoped at last to be clothed
in God’s justice alone” (65).
Though the differences between the
two theologians are as plentiful as their similarities, I think their theology
of grace remains central to mere Christianity—and to my Lenten preparations. I
will always enter Lent with bold initiatives, and I will likely always fail. Yet
so long as these bold initiatives are rooted in my love for God, and so long as
my confidence is always in Him alone,
I can be assured that my Lents will be “successful.” For in my desire to love
Him, I do in fact love Him; and in my weakness and sinfulness, I can still be
confident in His love, for His power is made perfect in weakness. Thus it is
with joy and hope that the Christian hears, “Remember that you are dust, and to
dust you shall return.”
In remembering that we are dust, we remember that in God alone
rests our joy and hope. It is as if we begin Lent every year with the words,
“Remember that you are misery, but more
importantly, remember that He is Mercy!” In embracing this Lenten call and in
making it our prayer, we surrender the work of our sanctity to God. God does
indeed make progress in me. Yet it is because of His work in this unworthy servant, not my own. Only with this
mentality can the pilgrim enter Easter Sunday every year with confidence and joy, for he will bring neither
pride nor adornments, but only empty hands—only miseria to greet the overflowing abundance of misericordia.